September 6, 2023

Deuteronomy 1: 37 Because of you the Lord became angry with me also. (NIV) 

What a costly mistake people make by thinking they have a legitimate right to hold a grudge.*

I had an employer who, while an overall good boss, sometimes had trouble with confrontation. When it came to dealing with a troublesome employee, she would often call her entire staff together and chastise all of us. Even when I knew I wasn’t the guilty party, those occasions always made me squirm.

I imagine Moses’ audience had a similar reaction to his accusations in this passage. He still harbored resentment that he had been punished for his actions (recorded in Numbers chapter 20), and was playing the blame game. Thanks to these people, he reasoned, he was banned from entering the Promised Land. But was it really their fault? Sure, they may have been the ones who sparked his anger but not one of them was responsible for what he did about it. Like my former boss, he failed to single out the truly guilty party – which in this case was himself.

It was bad enough that Moses would not accept responsibility for his actions but what did his bitterness say about how he felt about God’s role in the matter? Would God really be so petty as to punish Moses for something that was the fault of an entire nation?

It wasn't just what Moses did that upset God to such extremes.  God said, “You did not trust me enough to honor me . . .” (Numbers 20: 12) Later, he said, “You broke faith with me.” (Deuteronomy 32: 51) So, Moses did what he did; God did what he did; and Moses chose what to do next: harbor resentment. He might not have been able to change God’s mind about the punishment (see Deuteronomy 3: 23-25), but he could have saved himself from the burden of bitterness he carried.

What misfortunes in your life are someone else’s fault? Even if you are completely blameless, do you carry around a load of bitterness that doesn’t make anything better? Do you secretly blame God for allowing bad things to happen to you? And so what if God did nothing to prevent your misery - has he forced you to wallow in it? Do you not have freedom to choose your attitude?

Those of us who don’t fight pathological hoarding may still have hoarding issues. We hang on to many useless or even diseased things – grudges, distressing memories, injuries.*